Today I took Jonah to Fred Meyer for some sunglasses. I told him to point some out that he liked and his first favorite was a white pair with flowers, followed by a purple pair with hearts. My first instinct was to direct his attention to the more “boy” colored sunglasses and then I just about kicked myself because why the hell should he need “boy” ones? Argh! Can’t he sport pink ones just like his lady friends? Right then and there I felt like a failure as a parent.
I want so many things for my boys. I want them to be happy and healthy. I want them to find love and satisfaction in life. I have to admit though that there’s a part of me that also wants something for myself. I want to be proud of them. As in, I want them to be good people. I want them to have good principles. I don’t think that’s so selfish of a wish since society at large will also benefit from my kids not turning out like assholes but here’s the rub. At what point do I start to teach them about gender roles (or even other such directives that I happen to hold dear)? I don’t know the answer to this. It’s great that we take dance classes and like dolls and purses but at what point do societal pressures become a factor in hindering their socialization? I want to teach them to question rules about what “girls or boys” like, what they should do in life and most importantly, who they should love. I want them to be smart like that. But does it start with the pink sunglasses? I just don’t know.
We ended up with these.
The Shades
